Monday, July 9, 2012

Can you juggle?

Because I can't, and I desperately need someone to show me how.

I've been completely MIA, and I apologize.

I know some of you know what's going on with me, and I think it's only fair to give the rest of you the low down. 

6 months ago I made the decision to leave my husband for several reasons that don't need to be expressed here.  But it was my decision, and let's be clear that this is what I wanted.  But, I had to move into my parents' house, and my daughter and I have been there since.  It's difficult, and it's been an adjustment not just for us, but for my parents as well.  While we've all finally grown accustomed to sharing the kitchen, the washer and dryer, and every one's space, it's still hard to not have my own space.  I know it's hard for them as well.

I'm in the middle of an ugly divorce with someone who is completely unreasonable, and uncooperative.   This has taken a huge toll on me, in addition to my daughter whom I'm trying my damnedest to allow this to affect her as little as possible. 

I've lost all motivation to work out.  My eating is horrible, and I'm back up to 230 lbs, lowest being 211.   So, a 19 lb regain.  It's not the end of the world, but to be honest, it's the last thing I think about.  I often lay awake at night, allowing my mind to wander about all these things going on in my life.

"Is Grace OK?"
"What if she's not?"
"I'm sticking to my plan to move out in a year"
"What if I can't save enough money?"
"What if I can't find a place?"
"Can I do it on my own?"

I tend to focus on things I cannot change, or things I have no control over, which causes me to consume myself with worry, and continued anguish.

I'm not sure why I'm telling you all of this, considering my blog is about weight loss and eating...  but I guess my point is that the curve balls of life that have been thrown my way in the past 6 months have really screwed me up.  I've tried to catch them as they came, but I haven't been successful.  I'm finding it extremely difficult to juggle it all.   Work, my daughter, friends, family, relationships, gym, eating right, etc.   How do I get back to my routine?  How do I find that balance again?   I miss my happy place, but I'm headed to Gold's Gym tonight to see if I left it there.   

Wednesday, April 4, 2012

10 Reasons Why Women Should Stay Away From Weights

Put it down, woman!

1. You might break a nail.
2. You could even bruise a male ego or two.
3. You’ll eat properly and still be able to lose fat. Work of the devil!
4. You’ll look more like an athlete and less like a runway model. Skeletal is sexy, right?
5. You’ll be able to lift heavy things without asking a man for help, thus upsetting the balance of the universe.
6. You will be seen in public without high heels.
7. You’ll grunt, sweat and feel sore. So unladylike!
8. You’ll be proud of your pert bum instead of being self conscious about it like a normal woman.
9. You’ll be more active and confident instead of sitting around looking pretty. What are you, some kind of feminist?
10. You’ll be stronger, leaner and sexier – and we all know where that can lead!

HA!!! I loved this when I read it this morning.   I absolutely LOVE lifting weights. Strong bones, tendons, and muscles that also look and perform better; what woman would want that…?

Simply put, a weight trained woman will look better, and feel better in my opinion. There's just something about feeling stronger... having my muscles contract when I work them slowly.  There is seriously nothing better!   Luckily for me, today is my upper body training day.  

Now here's a good article on why women should lift weights...   ENJOY!  :)

Have a good Wednesday kids!

Monday, April 2, 2012

Monday Weigh In Day!

Hey kids!  I hope everyone enjoyed their weekends.  It was a lovely weekend here in St. Louis.  Sunny and in the upper 80's.   I LOVE warm weather.

Anyway..    Let's get to it.

Yesterday was Sunday Funday for me.  Meaning, it was my ex's day to have our daughter, so I went and socialized with some friends.   I indulged in a few adult bevvies, as well as food.  I ended up splitting hot wings and fries with a friend for lunch, (I ate 5 wings, and maybe 15 or so fries).  Then dinner was sushi.  I had one sushi roll, followed by the biggest slice of chocolate raspberry ganache cake I'd ever seen.  OMG it was a huge slice of heaven!   

So - with the water retention from the alcohol, combined with wings and fries and chocolate cake... I was a little leary of the scale this morning.

Well, I shouldnt have been. 

I'm down from 1 lb from Thursday, and overall down 4.6 lbs since last Monday.    So, my first official week of increasing my calories, and making it to the gym 5 days last week WORKED!!  I couldnt be happier.

Plans for this week...  dont really have any.  I'm just going to stick to what I did last week. 

Greek yogurt/organic granola for breakfast, snacks will be clementines or apples, almonds, turkey sticks and string cheese.    Lunches will be salads per usual, and I'll also be making chili or chicken and wild rice soup tonight for the rest of the week.

That's all I got kids...  Have a fabulous week, and I'll check in on Thursday with my stats!

As always, thanks for reading!

Thursday, March 29, 2012

Mid-Week Check In

Today's Thursday so it's mid-week for me.   Let's talk about my new "plan", and upping my calories. Let me be clear here, I still dont understand how this is working, or how its going to turn out.  I was leary.  Honestly, I still kind of am.  I'm trying really hard NOT to get excited about this, but it seems to be working.

I stepped on the scale this morning..

Down 3.4 lbs since Monday...

That's right!  3.4 freaking pounds!!!!!   

I dont know how it happened, nor do I care.  But I'm gonna take it. 

Now I'm sure youre interested in what the hell Im eating right..??

The more appropriate question would be, what am I NOT eating..??

I can tell you this, it is REALLY hard to eat 2300-2500 calories of good, nutritious foods.   I'm allowed 10% junk, so 230-250 calories a day of crap.   Trust me, I've taken advantage of that. 

Here's just a few things I've been shoveling into my mouth. 

Love my almonds!! 

 Typical Breakfast -  Chobani or Oikos Greek Yogurt, with 1/4 cup granola

 Lunch this week has been this steak and blue cheese salad.   Romaine lettuce, 4oz sirloin, bacon pieces, onion strings topped with Bolthouse Farms Creamy Blue Cheese dressing

Dinner last night - 4 oz tequilla lime shrimp over 1/2 cup black beans, and 1/2 cup frozen corn.  Because of my "fabulous" band, I could only eat half, so the other half is lunch today with a salad.

Snacks have been the Simms Turkey Sticks from Aldi, usually 2 with 2 slices of Sargento Ultra Thin Cheese slices, clementines, small apples, more greek yogurt, almonds of course or 100 calorie bags of popcorn.

I'm eating alot!!

Some of the junk Im eating looks a little like this...

 Buffalo chicken bar bites and sweet potato fries from Dave and Buster's. NO worries, I split them with a friend and only ate half.

 Chicken club wrap and sweet potato fries from TGIFridays... again, only ate half the wrap, but ALL the fries of course.  You know I LOVE me some french fries!

Mmmmm smoked baby backs!   Ate 1/2 rack

In addition to eating 2300-2500 calories a day, Im burning 600-700 calories at the gym on those days.  Or at least I think I am, Goddamn Polar...  

Anyway - average NET calories for the week is 2,012, and Ive been to the gym Sunday, Monday and Wednesday. Plan is for the gym again tonight, tomorrow and Saturday to give me 6 days this week.

Enjoy the rest of your week, and I'll weigh in on Monday!

Make good choices, and have a great weekend!

Monday, March 26, 2012

You want me to eat HOW MUCH????

As you all know I've been so back and forth lately, it's disgusting.  When people say "life gets in the way", it couldnt be more true.  My life has been an emotional rollercoaster for the past few weeks, maybe even longer.  To be honest, I stopped keeping track because I just stopped caring.  Part of the reason why I stopped caring was because the life changes that were going on, and are still going on, but also because I've hit a wall.  I've fluctuated with the same 3-5 lbs for the past 6 months or so.  I could easily blame it on my eating habits, but I was still getting to the gym regularly 4-5 days a week.  My NET calories each day were never above my BMR of 1860, and on most days my NET intake was around 1000-1300, so I should've been actively losing.    Right? 

Well, maybe not.

I've been at this for 3 years now.   I've consumed myself with knowledge of BMR, BMI, NET intakes, Simplex vs Complex carbs, lean proteins, etc.  I've done this and managed to lose 100 lbs.   So, it works right??  Cutting your calories, working out... basically calories in vs calories out.   Everything I've researched, everything I've done has worked.   Until now.

I met this guy at the gym, and we began talking about our journey, and our struggles.  He's lost 140 lbs in a year, and looks amazing!  He too has hit a wall, and has been fluctuating with the same 5 lbs month in and month out.   He told me about this podcast...    Fit 2 Fat Radio.  I thought his theory was RIDICULOUS... He was telling me that I should increase my calories and never eat below by BMR of 1860, in fact on the days I work out, to eat MORE than that.    I've always heard of upping your calories to see the scale move, but this was a little overboard.    It just wasn't adding up. Until I visited the website and listened to a few podcasts.    This is the one that hit home for me.. #83 "Eat More, Weigh Less"  It make's complete sense!   In addition to these podcasts, they have calculators on their site.   I took my measurements and according to their calculator, my Body Fat Percentage is 29.1%, which is in a healthy range.  This boggles my mind.   I put in a goal of 24% body fat, and it said my goal weight would be 210 lbs.   210!!!???   That's only 20 lbs away from where I am.    All of this is probably making your head spin.. either that or you've lost interest by now.   I know my head was spinning when He and I were talking about it.  It seems so confusing. 

My thoughts are this..   I havent lost any weight in over 6 months, so by giving this a go what's the worst that could happen?   I dont lose weight for another month?    

Conclusion - I'm going to try this.   Yesterday was Day 1... and I ate 2381 calories, burned 678, which leaves me with a NET of 1703.   It was actually really hard to eat that many calories of good, nutritious food, which is crucial.    I'll continue to weigh in weekly, I weighed in this morning and it was NOT pretty.. 


So I guess a week from now we'll see how this pans out.    The pod casts say to avoid the scale, and take measurements.  But - we all know I cant do that.   I'm going to take measurements also, but I'll be report those at the end of the month.

Sidenote - My Polar died yesterday.  For real this time.  No battery is going to fix this issue.   But - it is 5 years old, and I've worked out with it 4-5 days a week for 5 years.  So I guess I got my $120.00 worth.   Working out yesterday without it felt so weird.  I'll get a new one soon.

Have a great Monday!

Wednesday, February 29, 2012

Weigh In Wednesday

Hey there!

So, on Sunday after my weekend of fatty-food (yet OH SO DELICIOUS) eating... I weighed in at 229.

I'm happy to report, that today, just 3 days later - I'm down to 227.  

I've logged onto MyFitnessPal everyday, logged all my food, and I've been honest with myself. 

Living with my parents is not easy!!   My dad is a meat and potatoes kinda guy, he also has a love affair with potato chips and cookies, specifically Double Stuff Oreos, and Thin Mint Girl Scout Cookies.   There are 7 boxes of Thin Mints in the freezer 10 feet from my bed right now.  Do you have ANY idea how difficult it is to NOT open that box and eat them all!!??    I'm not really sure how he's NOT fat, but whatever..  obviously I wasn't blessed with his metabolism.  Then we have Ms Grace... whom eats pretty healthy for the most part because that's what I've tried to teach her, and lead by example, but she's not deprived in any way and of course we have things like fruit and string cheese, granola bars, and cereal (from Costco no less... who the hell needs 5 lbs of Cinnamon Toast Crunch!!???)  and fruit snacks.. my god I'm a sucker for some good fruit snacks!  Then we have my mother.   My mom is a snacker too.  Wonder where I get it from.  HA!   But luckily she eats pretty healthy too.   She's a FABULOUS baker, and her meatloaf is to die for.  So, I indulge on Sunday's when she makes a family dinner, but other than that we're cooking 3 separate meals a night.  It's hectic, but overall seems to work out okay.

Anyway, with all these temptations, I've been eating the "right way" according to my surgeon's rules because I have not done that in a very long time.  It's amazing what following the rules will do for ya.    For those of you that don't know, the rules are pretty simple...  lean protein first, followed by veggies, then finally carbs/starch.     The protein ALWAYS fills me up, and that's why I'm so used to eating them last, because let's face it... I'd rather have the mashed potatoes first! :)

I've been eating healthier snacks, something like this...  I've been avoiding almonds even though I love them, seeing as though I can't stick to one serving, and before I know it I'll have eaten them all.

Dinner last night was this lovely frozen delicacy

If you haven't had these, you HAVE to try them.   It's a complete meal, in a parchment pouch.  They're roughly $7.99 for 2 full meals.  They're in the frozen section, and there are several different options.   This specific one is 390 calories, 28 grams of protein.    The only downfall, by the time I'm ready to eat dinner after the gym, I hate waiting 30 minutes for them to cook.  They have a microwave option for 8 minutes, but I try to avoid that at all costs.  It never tastes the same, and since they have really good flavor it's worth the 30 minute wait.

That's it for me today.  Have a great day kids!

Sunday, February 26, 2012

Finally Settled In

Yep, you read that right kids..  I moved to my parents' house on January 16th, and I'm finally settled in.   It took a while, but all in all everything is going well with that, and my personal life. 

My eating on the other hand...EEEKK!!  That my friends, is a goddamn TRAINWRECK!  But, I'm guessing that's to be expected, yes??   I'll tell you one thing though, I never realized how much blogging actually kept me accountable, so guess what...  you can expect to see a few blogs a week from me.  I need something to keep me accountable again.

My last post here I was around 231-229 lbs.  Ive managed to maintain that weight all this time, so I guess things could be worse.

I traveled to Cleveland Ohio on Thursday, and I tell you what, there was NO holding back when it came to food, or alcohol for that matter.  But, I'm somewhat happy to report that this morning, I was 229, even with the Chocolate Dipped Cone from Dairy Queen I had for dinner on my way home from the airport last night.

Also - back to Weigh in Wednesday's, so I'll expect you to tell me to remove my from my ass if I slip up.  Thanks!

With that being said.. let's talk soup.

As you all know, I LOVE soup.  I love making it even more than I love eating it. Okay, well maybe that's a lie, HA!!

Since I'm at my parents' house now, I don't make my own soups anymore.  Mostly because I don't have my own kitchen. It's already hectic enough when we have 3 separate meals cooking for dinner, and both my mom and I making our weekly lunches at the same time.

So, I started using these.

 You can find these soups everywhere.   I've found them at WalMart, and locally at both Schnuck's and Dierberg's.  They're $3 a bag, and they come in tons of varieties.   Most of them are around 90-100 calories per cup, and each bag is 8 cups.  I usually eat 2 cups at a time, so $3 for 4 days worth of lunches is a hell of  deal if you ask me.

The Chicken Enchilada was just alright, kinda bland actually, but the rest of them are very very good!   They also make a pretty good chili, but you'll have to add meat, or it's not quite as filling.  

On the stove now for lunches this week, but not pictured, is the creamy broccoli cheddar which is also, 90 calories per cup and VERY good.

Anyway, now that you know I'm alive and haven't gained ALL of my weight back, I look forward to blogging again, and hopefully you look forward to reading them again.

Enjoy the rest of your weekend!

As always, thanks for reading!

Friday, January 20, 2012

Thank You!!!! (and I'm sorry)

Hey guys!!   Let me start by saying how sorry I am.  I've been MIA for a few weeks now.  I've had a lot of things going on in my personal life that I dont really wanna get into on here, but everything is fine, and my daughter and I are doing well.  We're trying to get a new daily routine down that works for us, and I'm trying my damndest to get it under control, but it hasnt even been a week yet.  I'll get there.

Because of the issues in my personal life I've been slacking at the gym.   I SWEAR I'm gonna get it together.  Actually, this week has been a vast improvement from my norm, so it's a start.  Yes, another start.  Another beginning.  Another do-over.   I'm tired of the rollercoaster, the up and down, the back and forth.  

My last post was a few weeks ago... and I was 227.   The week after that I think I was pushing 231.   This past Monday I was 229.   SO, at least I'm fluctuating within the same 5 lbs.  But - let's be honest, we all know playing with the same 5 lbs SUCKS!  

Onto my "Thank You"....  Eating For Real clocked in at over 10,000 views this week!!!!!  Thank you so much guys!!!   This is awesome!!

With that being said...  Have a great weekend!  I know I will... I'm spending it inside Gold's Gym... 

Monday, January 2, 2012

Monday Weigh In Day and New Years Resolutions

Hey!! Guess what happens when you take control over what you're putting into your mouth combined with exercise...

A 5 lbs loss, that's what!!!   Granted, since I gained 12 lbs over the holidays, I'm still up 7 lbs, but a 5lbs loss is a vast improvement, and a step in the right direction.

I had the day off today, so I decided to start the week off right.. hit the gym for an hour and 20 minutes, and burned 923 calories.  I was really working it today!! I guess all those New Year's Resolution people had me motivated. LOL  Speaking of... I hate the NYR's.   I know that's probably not the nicest thing to say, but seriously... pick a machine, get on it or MOVE out of my way.  I mean really... they'll be gone by mid February anyway, and the gym will be back to normal.  Thank God.

Let's talk food for today.  Since the gym is my strong suit, and food isn't, my New Year's Resolution isn't to lose weight, that's my daily life, but it's to be more accountable with what I"m eating.  I usually don't make NYR's only because it's more than likely something I should be doing anyway, just like this one, but I thought "why the hell not?"

I didn't have breakfast today, instead just coffee, then I made my way to Gold's.

Lunch was a salad... (sorry I dont have a pic) romaine lettuce, bacon pieces, tomato basil feta, shredded carrots, croutons and Botlhouse Ceasar.

About 2 hours later I was hungry.. a salad with no protein, of course I was hungry.   Good thing I decided to make soup before I left for the gym.


This was FANTASTIC!! I cooked it in low fat/low sodium chicken broth instead of water, and it made about 8 cups.  1 cup of soup was 210 calories, and VERY filling.

Dinner tonight was shrimp and rice...

7 large shrimp sauteed in the jerk sauce, mixed with 1 container rice/veggies - 480 calories.

This rice/veggie mix is usually $1.25... the entire box is 210 calories, and you microwave them for about 2 minutes.

 These are found in the freezer section as well, they're quite pricey though.. $7.99 for a box, and about 14 large shrimp, (2 servings).  Schnuck's had them on sale last week BOGO, so for 2 boxes, $8.00 I figured I could justify that.  Especially since that's 4 meals for me.   It was VERY good!!  I got the Island Lime Flavor too.  I'll try those this week.

So...  I consumed 1383 calories today, burned 923 and I'm left with a NET intake of 460 calories.  A bit low for me, but seeing as though my birthday's in 6 days, and I have several days planned with friends eating and drinking, I think it'll be fine and I'll make up for it somewhere along the way.

Have a great week, and Happy New Year!